Love Actually

I watched a movie the other night called ‘Love Actually’, it tells the story of how love can be found.  In the introduction the narrator uses the tragedy of the New York trade towers as an example that despite the tragedy, stories of love were everywhere. "Love is actually all around.” I liked that.

I found a song this Christmas written and sung by Casting Crowns, called ‘While You Were Sleeping’ and it tells the story of not paying attention to the love that is given for all of us.  Take a moment if you can and listen to it.

This song seems rather fitting considering what has happened in the world these last few weeks. The song is aimed for the United States but the rest of the countries in this world could easily have their names slipped in to its place.

Right now we are aware of the massacres in Newtown,Conneticut; Chengping,China and Webster, NewYork; shootings, stabbings…planned murderous rampages, all of these happening in the middle of this December, a time when all should be joy.

Yet these happenings are not new.  Our world is filled with suffering, has been, for well over 2000 years…more. 

Our world is filled with strange philosophies, ideas and thoughts that take us away from personal relationships, family and love; thinking that takes us away from God, from His hope and His peace. 

Well that’s what the world view seems to say.  But I’m not so sure…actually, I see love all around.

I see family holding on to one another, I see parents loving each other.  I see Grandparents praying for their children and grandchildren, loving them, giving them hope through illnesses and suffering.  I see elderly parents being cared for by their children while they travel the road to the end of life on this earth. I see friends to all of these, whole communities stepping up to show support and to offer help, hope, love. 

Unending love, actually.

I see men working hard to make lives better for others in this world, whether it is in other countries or whether it is right in their own neighbourhoods, men that are helping single mothers and giving to food banks, animal shelters and to causes that affect them just as much as the ones they are helping.  I see some of these same men working towards leading their families in love and purpose.  I see young women stepping out to help in the hospitals, to feed the poor and I see young mothers loving their children and teaching them to love in return.  I see Pastors sharing the message of what God wants us to know and I see their congregations responding, doing more, in love.

Unending love.

I see children in Christmas plays helping out their special needs friends, I see children lending a hand up to their team mate in sporting events, I see children throwing their arms around teachers as they give out gifts they have chosen, I see the teachers responding in kind.  I see children who are showing signs of taking care of others, of putting others before themselves…I see hearts filled with pride, joy, love.

Unending love, actually.

Yes, I see the light in the eyes of the children, I see the reflection in their parents’ eyes, and I see pride beaming in grandparents. I see the sparkle in the eyes of the great grandparents, the ones that say ‘my body is old but inside I am young’.  I see people looking at other people, wanting to help, daring to help, loving to help. 

I see the stories that tell this is going on in the whole of the world, stories that are on the edges of the suffering, but they are there, they can be found…actually, love is all around.

I love that.

New Again...the reason for the season, daring, moving and Beautiful!

My daughter shared this with the ladies at her bible study in Ontario, not the video but the song, she shared the music, the words, and the emotion.  These are some of her words...

Every year as I read through the christmas story something new impacts me and causes me to ponder and dig a little deeper. This year what has left me in amazement is Mary, the mother of baby Jesus, a mother like me. Like any of us who have carried a baby for nine months, who have gone through all of their childhood stages, cuddled with them, comforted and loved them, certainly Mary must have  felt these too, just like me.  Isn't it hard to believe that Mary did the same with our Messiah, our Saviour as we have done with our own little ones! 

When Jesus, just a baby, is swaddled in her arms, Mary finds herself in awe of the responsibility that God has given her, she wonders what His life will be and she ponders these things in her heart.

There is a scene in this video where the young boy Jesus slips and falls, he takes a tumble into the rocky pathway and Mary runs to him, cradling him in her arms, brushing the gravel away, she is looking closely at him, looking for any signs of hurt or pain.  Haven't you or I been there, looking closely at our own little ones for any reason for hurt, for tears... to brush them away the way Mary must have?
                                                                    
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I too am pondering all these things and in light of what has happened in Conneticut, aren't these emotions of you and I and the whole of the world, even more amazingly felt...pondered. Evil events, hurts, suffering; pondered in our hearts, just as Mary did as her grown son and Gods Son suffered. 

Mary, the  mother or our saviour, while watching Him grow up, had to also watch her 'baby' die the most horrific death that we could possibly imagine. This song has put this into perspective for me. Listen to the words and watch the story....imagine how Mary felt, knowing that Jesus is God's Son, but he was also her son. God had a plan and Mary's son was His way to make things all new again.

My daughters thoughts and words...I love that.

Whoever, Whenever, However

Yesterday I watched a video clip of Max Lucado, he was talking about God’s grace, a subject I have become very familiar with. I witnessed God’s grace being given to my husband as he lay in a hospital bed with him knowing he was not long for this world…knowing it, knowing his own deep loss and feeling his gain, all at once.  I have felt God’s grace myself, His grace covering me, even though I didn’t deserve it, despite the fact that I messed up, yes, undeservedly, I have felt His grace, melted in it, rejoiced in it.   

For years I have known about God’s grace, I've read about it, heard about it and sang about it…amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me.  I always thought, yes, I know God’s grace.  But I never did, I never was taken in by it, overwhelmed fully by it or so deeply affected by it…until now, until these days.  Now I know it and I am astounded, amazed, in awe and totally taken in.  

God’s Grace, Max Lucado says it is for whoever, whenever, however…true.

I have been studying in a book called the Grace of God by Andy Stanley; he says, 

“Grace is the offer of exactly what we do not deserve.Thus it cannot be recognized until we are aware of precisely how undeserving we really are. It is the knowledge of what we do not deserve that allows us to receive grace for what it is. Unmerited.Unearned.Undeserved. For that reason, grace can only be experienced by those who acknowledge they are undeserving.”

True.

This may exactly be the reason why King David reacts to the death of his infant son the way he does; there was nothing he could do.  God’s grace covers him even though he knows he doesn’t deserve it.  

He doesn’t deserve it.  

After all the despicable things David does, we would expect that God would withdraw His grace but He doesn’t, He gives it all the more…amazing grace.  Rahab, the prostitute, she knows she doesn’t deserve it, she knows all too well why, yet God gives her grace.   Judah falls short, he betrays his brother Joseph, Tamar is his breaking point and he knows he doesn’t deserve it…but he gets grace despite what he has done in his lifetime…God’s grace.

We all have our messes, but the truth is God does not give out grace according to those messes, He gives despite those messes.  Look around you; do you see that person whom you think is too messy to receive God’s grace?  Look again you will see that he is David, she is Rahab and that one over there is Judah.  We give up on people too soon…God does not.

God’s grace is given freely despite our actions; God’s grace does not depend on us.  Andy Stanley says that God’s promise and the grace given to David stands, “For it was not anchored by the behavior of the recipient, but by the grace of the one who had given the promise”

As it is with us, Gods promise is given, unmerited, unearned, undeserved for whoever, whenever, however.  And the truth that Max Lacado shares in one of his stories is what God wants us to know…”no matter how far you have fallen, no matter where you’ve been, I still love you, please come home…this is the message of grace.”

As messy as we are, the message of grace is for you and for me.  

I love that.

Graduation

I was at my sons for dinner the other night, we were all gathered around the table, his three little daughters and we three adults.  My son looked around the table and  to the littlest one he said “Let’s pray.”  She had her spoon in her hand waving it around ready to do something with the food that had been placed before her, but when he said that, she looked straight in his eyes, put her spoon down and clasped her little hands to pray…she is just six months away from being 2.  What an awesome privilege to see this little one begin her journey in prayer and in faith. 

She is just starting this journey, we will have much to witness and what a joy it will be!

A very good friend of mine passed away this weekend, she was 102.  She was one hundred and two years on this earth bringing joy to all of those around her, the sweetest lady, and a treasure to all who knew her.  She   had a warm welcome for anyone who came her way, she was an amazing encourager, a gentle calm in the midst of storms, a blessed friend and a powerful prayer warrior.  Her journey has been long and hard, short and sweet, a life well lived.

I will miss her, many will, especially her family, they were dedicated to her.  They cared for her in ways that were above and beyond that which any person could hope to be cared for. She was well loved. These last years she had wanted more than anything to go home to Jesus, to be cared for by him, there in Heaven...she is home now and as her granddaughter said, she is dancing with Jesus.  

She has just ended her journey here on this earth, it was much to witness and what a joy!

On Sunday Pastor Rob spoke a little to the fact that we graduate from one place to another and we do, we graduate from one level of schooling to another, from one level of life to another from one level of faith to another.  Yes, life is a series of graduations.

Brynlee, my little granddaughter is just beginning her journey, she will celebrate many graduations  and we will celebrate with her. Through each step we will clap our hands in joy.  Mary Neumann, my good friend has just made her last graduation…the biggest one of all.  She is being celebrated in heaven, welcomed in with joy.  She is dancing with Jesus. 

I love that.

“You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song   before you, and all of the trees of the field will clap their hands.”

Isaiah 55:12

A Drop in a Bucket

I was talking with a young woman this weekend, she was sharing about her job, she worked with women who were in trouble, women abused by men, abused by drugs, women out of prison, women fighting for a better life, women looking for help.  This was her job, caring for other women, women not so blessed as herself.  One of the other listeners there said, “What a noble job choice you have made.” The young woman looked up and said "We are all part of the same job, we each share in the responsibility of caring for others, we all make a difference, at least we all can."  She told us that her work was like filling a bucket…each person in need of help has their own bucket and it is filled one drop at a time from the people they come in contact with.  All sorts of people are putting drops in, but, she added, "If we are the ones who put in those last few drops that fill that bucket we are quick to pat ourselves on the back, ‘look what I did, I've filled the bucket!’ we forget the fact that there are others that have made a contribution...contributions that made it possible for the overflow."

This fact that she was pointing out is thought provoking. 

We all have a noble calling you and me, if we would look and see the buckets that need filling, every drop is noble.

A friend of mine says we need to get away from politics, the politics of life and of this world, we need to get back to simply helping others, to feeding the poor, giving a fair wage to the everyday worker and serving others rather than trying to serve ourselves. I said to him "Jesus said ‘the poor will always be with us.' We can’t do everything, this is the way of the world, of society, the poor will always be with us."  He asked “Why?”

Yes, why indeed.  As far as it depends on us, what can we do for the poor and for those in trouble, the poor in spirit?  What can you and I do?

I like this bucket idea, if we could just add our drops to the bucket and realize that we have done our part; that we have simply done our part whether it is putting in the first few drops, pouring in a lot or whether it is putting in those last drops that cause the overflow.  This may seem a small thing to do, a drop in a bucket, but like this young woman suggested; every drop is noble. Watching for the buckets and adding drops, looking out for the overflow, hoping for the overflow, this is what we can do.

^“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. Then the righteous will answer him 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you?  When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you? 

The King will reply 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." 

Matthew 25:35-40

                                                                                                        

Filling buckets…every drop is noble.

I love that.

November

November, this is the month that everything started happening, it is the month that everything happened, the time that everything happened all at once - in slow motion - but in the blink of an eye.

I have been a little emotional this past week, it seems my heart and my soul know what took place at this time three years ago.  And my mind has been taking me on memory tours of a time I shared with a man who grew up with me but who would not grow old with me.

Memories; sad and hard, happy times and good times, friends and family times, troubled times as well as joyous God filled times.

 

I have shared this story a life time ago but I’m telling it again because these years have been on my mind...

On August 21^st 2005 Pastor Rob provided an opportunity for each person in the congregation to spend wisely for God's Kingdom, he gave out $100.00, one hundred talents, to anyone who wanted to participate in this extravagant opportunity  Even though I took up the challenge I went home wondering, what could I do with these talents?

That Sunday we were having all of my family home for dinner, so once I got home, my children would be there, we’d have lunch and then get ready for extended family to arrive…when someone unexpected came.

Some of you know that we have lived on a farm in Sumas Prairie, beside the freeway, the highway that takes all sorts of travelers to their destinations, east and west, near and far.  From the very day that we moved into that old farmhouse God had in mind to prepare us for service…to entertain His angels.

Our neighbors had big metal gates with signs that said ‘Keep Out’ or signs that said ‘Beware of Dog’ but we preferred to keep our yard open and they came…they came to ask for help.  They came for a can of gas, for the use of our phone, for a ride, for directions, one or two asked for a place to keep warm and one asked for a knife…which I gave, with a prayer whispered just under my breath.  For some, we called the fire department and others the ambulance. They drove in the yard and walked in off the highway.  They came before the sunrise and well after dark.  They came on sunny days and cold windy nights. They waded through the rain filled ditches and trudged through the snow drifts.  Some of them came bravely up to the door and others afraid to see who would answer their knock. They never stopped coming and we never turned one away, not even the one who asked for a knife.

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On this day, as we were preparing for lunch we were all talking about the service in church that morning and the talents, thinking, wondering, planning...when there was a knock at the door.  John went to answer it and came back saying, "there is a young fellow at the door; he wants something to eat."  He didn’t want to use the phone or get directions or ask for a ride, he simply wanted something to eat.

Our kids, all at once said, ‘give him the money!’ 

In my mind I thought, I can’t just give him the money, though my heart was pounding.  No, but I would give him something to eat.

  

John was chatting with him outside in the yard and he found out that the young man was traveling from Montreal to Victoria on foot…just one foot.

I brought a plate of food for him and I asked ‘where will you stay when you get to Victoria?’  His answer to me was this "the Good Lord will take care of me there, just as He has this whole trip…you see"  he said  "I am spreading His word along the way, I’m telling as many as I can about what God can do."  At that moment I felt the rush of God. With my heart pounding, I told him the story of what happened in my church that morning and then I gave him the talents.

He ate his lunch and chatted with John, with me and with the dogs.  By this time the rest of my family were arriving…no one saw him walk off or how he got back on the highway or which way he went, he was gone.

 ‘Always entertain strangers for by doing so, you may entertain angels without knowing” 

Hebrews 13:2

We never will know how that angel fared along Gods highway or how his talents multiplied…but we know this, that story was told many times that day…the story of what God can do multiplied.  I don’t know how many times my children or John told the story, but I know this... faith multiplied. 

That was the last angel we entertained there…what a wonderful way to end 16 years of serving strangers…with the story of an angel, 100 talents and knowing what God can do.

We moved off the farm a month or so later, October 1, just before the winds came, just before November.  

How are you Doing?

We were talking this morning in church, talking about following God, being obedient, doing what He says, doing this, doing that and what popped up was the question we often ask one another, how are you doing?

We often are more focused on what we are doing rather than who we are doing it for.  It seems we are always thinking of what we are doing and often we take it one step further and focus on what others are doing.  When we meet someone new we often ask them, what do you do? What are you doing with your time?  Sometimes we end up comparing their doing with our own doing.

There are all kinds of doing and of course we were talking this morning about doing for God, but the fact is we displace the doing for God to what are we doing, we are almost selfish in the thoughts about what we do, bragging about doing the right thing, even doing the wrong thing, putting the focus on being proud in serving Him, being obedient to Him…or not.  In our obedience, or in our disobedience, besides affecting our relationship with God we are also affecting one another.

 

Yes, really it does matter what we are doing, what we do affects others, what we do hurts others, but hopefully it blesses others. What we do matters.  A friend of mine, just the other day said to me, “I don’t have to do anything, things will happen and play out just as they should.”  But the truth is we do have to do something, and we are all influenced by what the other does, sometimes in just small seemingly uneventful ways but sometimes in large, big picture, hurtful ways.  Sometimes, and hopefully, more often these influences happen in beautiful, life changing, kind ways.  Truly, small or large, what we do matters, there are those who will be affected…affected by you, how are you doing?

I read a quote the other day; it comes from a book that has recently been made into a movie, a book called 'Cloud Atlas' by David Mitchell…

“Our lives are not our own.  We are bound to others, past and present, and by each crime and every kindness we birth our future.”

I have been affected by these words, how we are bound to one another, bound by what we do, crimes or kindnesses have effects that can last into the next  generation and the next, not only those that belong to you but also to the generations that belong to those you are doing to.

I want to do better…but doing better is hard work.

Paul says it well, 

“For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.  For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do – this I keep doing.”  

                                                                                                            Romans 7:19

How you are doing matters…

How are you doing?

God's Land

I made a solo road trip to Kelowna this weekend, the scenery when I could see it was amazing. On the way there, through the mountains, the roads were clear, edged lightly with fresh snow, the trees along the way on fire with yellows and shades of orange.  The grand mountains towering above everything were frosted with snow; majestic is the name to describe them.

How majestic is your name in all the earth…those words came to mind.

Before long I was driving through the rolling yellow flatlands, dry and long grasses swaying in the wind interspersed with lone tumbleweeds, then on into the hillsides dipping in and out of the valleys, at some points it seemed I was driving through the tops of the trees, their height hidden below in the valleys and then there, a change and I was driving alongside them.  Amongst them were bare hillsides, empty places surrounding circles of trees that stood alone somehow saved from the ravages of the pine beetle…there will always be trouble.

It was a freeing feeling driving solo, taking in God’s creation, processing life’s circumstances, clearing my mind, straightening out choices, right or wrong…hashing it out with God, Him listening, me talking, Him comforting and confirming, me listening.  There is nothing like a drive to clear up your mind from the fog of life.

I drove through some fog on the way there and again on the way home, it is a little scary, just when you are noticing the beauty of the world around you, there you are socked in, the world faded away from around you and there is nothing.  It actually becomes hard to breathe when you find yourself in the fog it is all you can do to stop the panic from entering in.  Interesting don’t you think, one moment you are entirely clear and the next moment all is gone, clarity, peace, safety, any sense at all, gone.

 

When the mountains have had a dusting of snow every detail becomes clear, the lay of the land becomes more pronounced, every crevice, valley, rock face and sheer cliff side stand out. Every forward, back and far slope revealed. Every place where trees have been lost lay low, every rockslide bare and every logging road traced out for all to see, the truth of the land, God’s land, God’s truth.  And then the fog comes down covers and fills every space, every detail, the very air we breathe, it’s like you lose track of the truth.

Ah, but the truth is, don’t panic, there will always be trouble, the fog will lift…it will.

And then, what a beautiful world we will find ourselves in, when we trust God to take us from place to place.  Trust Him, grace is just around the corner through the trees, over the hills, through the flat lands…into God’s land...into God's truth.

I love that.

Run the race, Finish well

This morning my daughter ran in the Niagra Falls Marathon.  This particular marathon is known to have one of the most beautiful places where you can end a race.  In fact it is considered one of the most beautiful finish lines in the world, not to mention one of the wonders of the world.   The particular race she participated in was the Half Marathon, 21.1 kilometers.  Devon said the day was beautiful, blue skies radiating off the water that stretched the length of the route and the trees that were scattered along the way were colors only Ontario knows, vibrant in their beauty.  And my beautiful daughter running through it all taking it in, I wished I had been there.

I told Devon the night before the race to enjoy it, to go with God…to have fun, to laugh and to cry. Tears of joy…tears of emotions met…these are some of the best tears.

I have just finished talking with my girl and shed some of my own tears as she relayed to me the details of her run, her half marathon.  To me it almost seems an oxymoron to call it a ‘half’ marathon.  A Marathon, just the word requires thoughts of work. While you are running, your heart rate goes up and your oxygen level thins, it is hard work and all the parts of your body have to be prepared and trained.

Though I have never been a runner let alone a marathon racer, I understand how it works, how it affects the body.  Nearly 3 years ago my husband was in a marathon, yet he was not a runner at all, but his heart took him into one.  His heart rate for two weeks, day and night, was at the pace of a runner in the middle of a marathon.  His heart was racing so fast that his maximum oxygen capacity was being utilized. Nothing could be done to give him enough oxygen to supply his hearts need…the need in order to finish this mad marathon he was on. Yes, he endured the race and by the grace of God, he finished well.

My daughter, running her race, thinking of her marathon and finishing well, brings me back to all these memories. And it is an honor in a way; it is a reminder of how we can show honor to those who have gone before us, run the race…finish well.

When I told her what was on my mind, she said “Mom, Dad was running right beside me”

 I love that.

        “…and let us run with endurance the race that is set out before us.”   Hebrews 12:1

Love you with everything

Something came up in one of my meetings last week; it was inside of a discussion of Kay Arthur’s words in our study guide.  It had to do with sinning, with repentance and forgiveness.

   

I am all about asking for forgiveness of sins, past and present, but once this is done, we do not have to keep asking for forgiveness; forgiveness comes once and for all.  We need to stop fighting a battle that has already been won.  Unless of course we want to go back to the battle time and time again…sinning again, the same sin again, and again. This is a different issue, but if you have asked for forgiveness and gone forward sinning no more, then that is it…done, the battle is won. Do not be guilted, bombarded, pounded with not being good enough…you are done, it is finished, the battle is won.

It is finished, I love that.

.

Stephen brought up an interesting point in his sermon Sunday morning.  He talked about the Israelites coming out of Egypt only to enter the desert for 40 years and then to be given a so called promised land, a land that was promised but not so promising, a land of milk and honey, but not so much. It was a dry land just a step better than the desert they came out of, there was little rain and this land was filled with giants. So these people of God went from slaves in Egypt to wandering in a desert to a land that was filled with giants.  Each step required faith and trust to believe God. Now, these were hard steps to take, to believe God, to trust Him, they had a hard time doing it, some of them never did, some of them never made it into that promised land.

And then Stephen pointed out that this is how God leads us, even today.  He takes us from a situation that is hard, a situation where we have nothing to do but trust God to a place where all we have is to trust God! This is what God does; He makes promises that require us to trust Him, to depend on Him.  Think about it, each new accomplishment, each small failure, each giant step and every small step that we take puts us into a situation where we need to trust God again.  Trusting God never ends.  Trusting God is a never ending story of faith, of love, of peace and joy.

Asking for forgiveness frees us, trusting God saves us, and believing Him is life.

I want to live this way; free, trusting, believing…living; with every breath I take, with every step I make.

“…every breath, every moment life beats in my chest, let my life praise you…

                                                     love you with everything.”                                                                                                                                   Gungor

                                                     

I love that.

God's Grace

This weekend has been a celebration of Thanksgiving, the holiday where we remember how far God has brought us.  How much He has given us, the blessings we have received, the ones that are there for the world to see and who will rejoice along with us and the ones too, that are seen only by our own heart and soul.

I love both kinds of blessings.

 

I have just written beside #659 in my journal of thankfulness, the book where I record the gifts I am thankful for in the moments of my day. I am aiming for one thousand written down gifts and recorded messages of thankfulness. Mostly I am thankful for God’s Grace and these words are written in unseen script aside each and every entry.

God’s grace.

For this Sunday morning service our church put together a slide show of our people, saints in Christ, holding up signs that are written with words of the things they are thankful for.  It is a beautiful showing of thankfulness, love and blessings.  Some were thankful for books and toys, there were those that were thankful for family and for friends.  Some were thankful for nature, for health and for provision. I cried when I read that my daughter was thankful for her husband.

I am thankful for husbands too, the two that are married to my daughters and for my son who is one. I am thankful for those who have been lost in body but are so present in heart and soul, Kevin, Gord and my own…John; those that have been saved by grace to a better place.

Saved by grace.

Each and every day I feel the saving grace of God, how He wraps His strong arm around me and holds me up, through every circumstance, every failure, every accomplishment, every win, every loss, with my friends and with those that are not so much.  His saving grace is always there, in my sadness and in my joys.  These last few months have been good and I really have been blessed, I have so much to be thankful for.

#659 I am thankful for all the joy in my life…and God’s grace

I love that.

My Confidence

Confidence, I have come across this word several times in the last few weeks, among other things, it reminds me of a conference I went to, maybe two years ago.  The message of the conference had to do with having self confidence, keeping it, and holding on to it, knowing we are worth something, being confident in our selves, knowing who we are and what we stand for.  The conference speaker used Hebrews 10:35 for the basis of the message...

“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.”  

                                                                                                                          

The thing about this verse is that it has nothing to do with us, but everything to do with what we believe; our faith, do we believe in something that is true?  Is the God we believe in true? Do we believe in His son, who died for us? Can we be confident that we can trust Him, believe that He is who He says He is?  Do we have confidence that He will do what He says he will do?

I am not always confident in myself, I fail, I make wrong choices, I am human, and I am far from perfect.  Sometimes I trust myself to be wise and true and good, to know who I am and to stand up for myself and what I believe.  But sometimes I lose all the confidence that I could possibly hold on to…as far as I am concerned.  Yes, I fail and I make wrong choices and it leaves me wondering “what was I thinking?”

Well what I am thinking is that I am so thankful that the confidence I have in myself is not what counts.  What counts is the confidence I have in my faith, my God.  He will be my right hand, He will hold me up, He will give me grace when I fail, He will say this is the way walk in it, He will see me where I am, He will hold me in the palm of His hand, though I walk through the valley of death He will comfort me and He will carry me on the wings of an eagle to give me strength. He turns my sadness to joy and He rejoices over me with singing! My confidence is in Him, He is my confidence.

This past week our study spoke to having confidence in your faith…

 

“…if you cling to Gods word, believe Him, not turn away no matter how difficult it gets, you will be able to persevere, to possess your soul. Your soul is what makes you, you. Faith wins!”

I love that.

“Whatever may pass and whatever lies before me…bless the Lord oh my soul ten thousand years and forever more!

Back to real life...

It is that time of year again, the time when we all hunker down to get back at it...back to real life.  Setting schedules, back to bed times and meal times... proper ones. Phones are ringing with calls that are telling us times and places to be and how to get there. We are searching out the details we need to know from news papers, lists taped to doors, computer postings and from friends who know more.

When I was a young mom, this was not my favorite time of year, I loved having my children home with me, I loved the carefree days of summer but I also looked forward to having a schedule...organized time.  Even though I am in a different place and time in this life, still, I am affected by this time of year, even a Nana has a schedule.  But what I think of as we all start setting our schedules is how quickly we can get caught up in all the planning.

With all this planning in the air, let's remember to look and see who we are planning for.  We need to remember to consider one another, especially those we love, that as we go about it, all this planning, to offer encouragement, to think of showing love, compassion, respect...we are all God's children, hoping for good.

"And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds."

Hebrews 10:24

As we head out of summer and back to real life...enjoy your planning...and God Bless.

                                                                                

See you around here in the fall...I love that.

Feeling Right...

Something doesn’t feel right.

That’s how life goes...some things don’t feel right ...and some things, feel just perfect. I talked to a good friend about this one day, just a heart beat ago, and its true...so true, about many things.

Some sin does not feel right. But some sin feels right and good and perfect.  The interesting part is that one can be moved easily from one column to the other...easily.

We are all sinners.

Yes, we all sin and believe it or not, God does not play favourites in this area.  One sin is not better than another, a sin is a sin.  Face it we are all sinners.  It’s a new revelation for me, not the sinning part or that we all are one, it is the fact that God does not play favourites.  I usually love new revelations of God’s love and grace and mercy, those that happen because of eventual goodness, seemingly deserved, goodness winning out.  But right now I am in awe of  the revelation that He can show exactly the same love and grace and mercy to those who seemingly do not deserve it...how could God love that sinner, the one who did that sin?

I love that about God, He can make it so that any sin is a blessing, something to be grasped and held on to, to turn over...to turn and sin no more.

Do not sink in your sin, God has grace and mercy for you, He can turn all things to good, for you and for me...especially me.

I don’t know who said it, or where I found it, but I am saving this little quote, I am putting it where I can see it and read it and take it in...

“It’s not about what it is, it is about what it can become...”

I love that.

Stepping Stones

It was my birthday today, I received notes from friends, old and new, words of blessings, words of wisdom, love and encouragement...all gifts of the heart.  I received a gift or two as well and maybe one more, given, poured out from the soul.  The givers in themselves gifts of God.

Years ago my Dad gave me a gift of words, he told me once, when I was just a girl really, I was stepping out into the world and he said ‘One step at a time Judy, first you crawl, then you walk and then, you can run...take it one step at a time.”

I have always loved that he told me that, that I have those words to fall back on, to slow down and measure my pace.

When we first moved into this home, John made a sidewalk part way around the house.  Embedded in the walkway are red stepping stones placed a certain distance apart, it is hard to walk at a normal pace if you want to step on each one, each step has to be measured.  Life is a maze of stepping stones, taking you in the direction you should go. The trick is to step on the right stones in the right measures.

A friend said to me the other day, be like a scale...balance everything, measure what is good. 

Yes, but in order to measure something you need to have something to measure against...hopefully it is something good.

Sometimes, I find that God gives you something, it is not yours to keep, it is given in order to see what is possible, to see a glimpse of what He has in store for you.  It is given as a means of measure, to measure all things against, to taste and see and know and wait for it to come for keeps...for you.  It is a stepping stone, a gift and God gives his children good gifts...I love that.

 I will be measuring all things against that gift...something good...a gift from God.

This is where I stand right now, I am on the road to enjoying life, stepping out and stepping on stones...one step at a time measuring and balancing good gifts.

“Every good and perfect gift is from above”   James 1:17

I love that.

The Greatest Story Ever Told

A man came up to my desk while I was on my shift at the Cancer Agency today.  He handed me a piece of paper, said someone must have dropped it, it was a boarding pass for American Airlines flying out of Chicago to Providence for a Ms Mcphail.  It was dated May 3, 1997. It begged to tell the story of a missed flight, perhaps a love lost, a rendezvous not met.  Perhaps they did meet and the pass was saved as a remembrance of that anniversary...but now lost.

Ahh a love story, who doesn’t enjoy a love story?

I shared and witnessed a few of them this morning... 

A little girl was coming off the elevator with her grandmother she seemed very happy and I asked her what she would be doing today.  She said she was going to be having a play date today, she had one yesterday and today she was going to have another one...”with the exact same person!” She was skipping with excitement and clapping her hands in joy, her grandmother smiling beside her.  Love, what a great expectation.

A little earlier two very elderly patients came out of the senior’s clinic in the office right next to my desk, I wished I had asked how old they were, but they were in love, no doubt. She was teasing him about being in her way, he turned slightly and said “yes dear”, she smiled and winked at me, he reached for her hand and held it, saying “put it into high gear mom” Now they both laughed, he with his cane and her with a walker. I stood and watched them walk down the hallway admiring them, hoping I will have that some day.  Love, such a beautiful time.

At least twenty people gathered at the elevator, they were subdued, some of them holding packages, talking quietly, looking for others, waiting.  I thought maybe they were going to a conference or a learning center, but no, they were all one family going upstairs to hear what the Doctor had to say about their loved one.  I heard later it was the largest gathering of support for one patient.  A dedicated family overflowing with love...love wanting more.

Today, a husband wheeled his frail, frail wife in a wheel chair up to the elevator, he took her just to the side of the door, came in front of her and bent down to kiss her, she ever so slightly lifted her face to meet his...it was the sweetest kiss. Then he went around, wheeled her into the elevator and the door closed.  My heart stopped and a tear fell.  Love still being felt and honoured and mourned.

I witnessed all these today and maybe more, yes there were more.  I was on the outside peeking in on love stories...they are all around us...I love that.

Love...the greatest story ever told.

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.  

But the greatest of these is love.”

1 Corinthians 13:13

The Orange Wallet

I was in the grocery store standing in the checkout line, a man was standing behind me holding an orange wallet, obviously a woman’s wallet and I wondered about it.  I wondered why he had a woman’s orange wallet, I wondered why he didn’t seem to care and I wondered where his wife was, surely coming around the corner anytime.  He placed his bag of sugar on the counter, the bag tore open and sugar spilled out, he tried to brush it away but gave up on that.  Just like he didn’t care about the orange wallet, he didn’t really care about the spilled sugar.  He was opening the orange wallet; his cards slipped out and fell to the floor.  He reached down to pick them up and I wondered if I should help him or should I say something, a joke maybe.  

Somehow I thought, no.

Now I was paying for my groceries and about to lift the bags when he started talking, not really to anyone.  He said, 'my wallet was lost but it was found intact.'  

I thought, the orange wallet?  

He went on to say that everything was in it, all of his credit cards, all of his identification, all of his loose papers and all of his money.  One thousand dollars, cash.  We were all listening, the clerk, the East Indian lady behind him and me.

He was pretty comfortable with this orange wallet, was this the one lost?  At any rate the wallet had been found, someone had found it and turned it in completely as it was.  He wanted to give the person who found it a reward but they hadn’t left a name and the police didn’t know or wouldn’t say.  The person had found it in a recycling bin at the recycling depot.  I asked 'how do you think it got there?'  He said he thought it probably slipped out of his pocket into a bag he was taking to the road. 

From what I had witnessed earlier, I nodded in agreement.

 

How amazing that there are honest people, considerate and humble and willing to return lost items...people who are steadfast and true to others in their world, people who are not looking to their own gain at the expense of another’s loss...honest people, heroes really.

 

He was amazed, we all were, but here is the part that stood out.

 

When he realized his wallet was gone, he searched the house, looking everywhere, madder than a hatter.  His wife had asked him if he had prayed.  He said to us, that he told his wife, “Don’t’ be ridiculous, God does not care about some fool who lost his wallet!”  She had replied with “well then I will pray.”

Four hours later he got a phone call from the police, “Sir, have you lost a wallet?”

He didn't know any of us, he didn’t know how we would respond but he didn't care...he was ‘out there’ talking about God, talking about praying and telling us about answered prayer.

I love that.

Something to talk about

My friend sent out this quote this morning,

“Don’t judge someone just because they sin differently than you”

That’s an eye opener.

Then there was this warning I read recently in a book by Elsie H. R. Rempel,

“Because we see life most clearly from our own perspective, we can be tempted to consider our faith stage the norm, and use it to judge others.”

Judging, perspectives, being tempted, sinning, seeing most clearly...differently

...differently than you.

Really, it is hard to see anything at all in a different way because we are seeing everything through our own eyes; everything is weighed from our own experiences, our own perspectives, it is all weighed by what is going on in our own head. From our view, it seems that what we see is the norm whether it is in regards to our faith or any other occurrence in life.  And really what is going on in our head sometimes seems so simple, so straight forward.  Why doesn’t everyone see that? Well the truth is everyone does see that...from their own stage of the norm!  We are all going around looking out at the world from our own, simple, straight forward viewpoint.

It is hard work to turn and see the view from someone else; the possibilities of what could be a different view.

I want to see differently, yes I do think of glasses as half full rather than half empty, yes I do look to the positive rather than the negative but I want to see differently. 

I am also thinking that to see differently we have to talk about it...otherwise how will we know?

A Tear fell

Andrew shared a beautiful sermon this morning.  His words were filled with heart and soul, love and truth.  His words brought me to tears.

God was found in a gentle whisper... 1 Kings 18,19

I am sure that everyone in church this morning was going over their own mountain top-to-in-the valley experiences, moments of time filling their hearts and minds and souls, feeling the way I did. Thinking of their times in the desert, maybe still there, holding out for God, waiting for His gentle whisper.  

I heard a pin drop... a tear fell...and then, more.

In amongst the beautiful words Andrew shared this morning, one small thing caught my attention.  It had to do with imagining outcomes or reasons of events.  This is something we all are guilty of...putting our imaginations to things that happen in our lives.  Imaginations that have no basis for truth, but are thoughts of what could be, or what should be and maybe even what we should do about it, all blown up into such proportions that the truth itself becomes distorted.

 

How often do we get ourselves in trouble by doing this?  I know I’m guilty of it.

Or how often are we hurt by doing this, we come away feeling unloved, not accepted, maybe even abandoned.

On Friday night I was in a small book store, where I read an excerpt from a book, Wherever You Go There You Are, the author says

 “...we usually fall quite unawares into assuming that what we are thinking – the ideas and opinions that we harbour at any given time - are the truth about what is ‘out there’ in the world.  Most of the time it just isn’t so...we lock ourselves into a personal fiction that we already know what is happening- all the while remaining in thoughts, fantasies and impulses, mostly about the past and about the future, about what we want and like, and what we fear and don’t like, which spin out continuously, veiling our direction and the very ground we are standing on.”

Imaginations that cloud what is true; imagining that you are not loved, believing that you could not be loved, supposing this , thinking that...these imaginations hurt.  They hurt the heart and soul.  We should all work at seeing what is true.

“If I could give you one thing, I would give you the ability to see yourself 
through my eyes.  Then you would realize how special you are."  

                                                                                  unknown

Hmmm, I love that.

Things from life this week

 "Nothing is ever as it seems ~ every perfect picture hides a mess or two"

                                                                                                in a song by Rita Wilson

...so true, especially in these days, but conversely, inside every mess there is a perfect picture too.

My new word ~ epipipto ~ it means; to fall on you in embrace; to take possession of you.

the word is found in Luke 15:20 ...when the father sees his prodigal son returning home, he runs out to meet him and falls on him in embrace!

The Lord wants to fall on you in embrace, to take possession of you. 

epipipto ...I love that. 

If Jesus were on trial for being your Lord and savior, would you constitute enough evidence to prove Him guilty? 

                         You.  You are going to be the evidence that Christ is who He says He is.

in a sermon by Darrell Johnson

'When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said "I am the light of the world.  Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." '  John 8:12

Intimidation  is something that  handicaps your ability to function normally; 

it prohibits you from being yourself.

                                             so you can see the world,

                  the mountain,

      Climb                                                                       not so the world can see you.

Dana saw him the other day, he was standing out in the yard watching Kevin levelling the ground around the site of the new shop...  and Kenzie was playing peek a boo with him out on the porch.  Devon was watching and asked “Kenzie who are you playing peek a boo with?” “With Papa” he replied, “he’s sitting right there.”

    The heart has its reason that reason knows nothing of.

I love that.